A Note!

I am off on a speaking tour in the States until October 25. I've done a set of cartoons for while I'm away, but there won't be any "Golden Oldies" 'til I return.

Yom Kippur 2009

The Day of Atonement is upon us again. The next Dry Bones cartoon will appear next Wednesday, September 30 ...along with a very special notice!

Tsom Kal, have an easy fast.

Hebrew Calendar (1994)

Today's Golden Oldie is a Dry Bones cartoon done 15 years ago for Sukkot in 1994.

Back then folks were beginning to get excited about the dawn of a new century (on the civil calendar). In 1994, the holiday fell in August. This year it begins at the end of next week, on Friday evening October 2.

the Goldstone UN Gaza Report

From the ZOA press release response to the shocking UN Report:

"The very title of the Report - ‘Human Rights in Palestine and Other Occupied Arab Territories: Report of the United Nations Fact Finding Mission on the Gaza Conflict’ – contains a falsehood – namely, that Gaza is “occupied” by Israel when, under Article 6 of the Fourth Geneva Convention on the Protection of Civilian Persons in Time of War, a foreign power is only considered an occupier “to the extent that such Power exercises the functions of government in such territory” – something Israel has not done since 2005."

And also:

"the Report claims that “The data provided by non-governmental sources with regard to the percentage of civilians among those killed are generally consistent and raise very serious concerns with regard to the way Israel conducted the military operations in Gaza.’ Yet, as British journalist Melanie Philips points out, Israel provided a detailed breakdown of the Palestinians killed in Gaza and stated that the vast majority of these were Hamas or other terror operatives. Even the UN eventually acknowledged that some 75% of the dead in Gaza were Hamas terrorists."

And:

"ZOA National President Morton A. Klein said, “The ZOA condemns this atrocious, new installment in the international effort to delegitimize Israel, using perverted and spurious norms of international law in order to invalidate Israel’s elementary, fundamental right and obligation to defend its territory and its citizens. It is nothing less than an anti-Semitic, Israel-bashing, immoral piece of trash. We are appalled that Justice Goldstone was willing to ruin his legal reputation by participating in this dishonestly-conceived and fraudulent investigation. Most serious, perhaps, is the fact that Richard Goldstone was willing to bend and pervert legal norms – such as the definition of occupation and of combatants – in order to pin non-existent legal responsibility on Israel for acts were both justified and indeed necessary in self-defense."

To read the complete Press Release from ZOA (America's oldest Zionist Organization) in response to this latest example of Jewish Defamation and UN anti-Israel bias, click on ZOA Press Release.

Sorry (1994)

Today's Golden Oldie is a Dry Bones cartoon done 15 years ago this month in August of 1994.

It refers to the ritual and practice of asking for forgiveness called "slihot" or "slichot" ...which you can learn about by clicking here.

Sunday Mail: Dry Bones U.S. Tour

Posting a cartoon every weekday leaves no room for me to simply share news, ideas, and other stuff with you. So welcome to 'Sunday Mail: Letters from Dry Bones', the new, once-a-week Dry Bones feature.

Item One: the Dry Bones October Tour:

"The Latest News and Other Jokes" ...as close to stand-up comedy as a sit-down cartoonist can get. Will Dry Bones be coming to a city near you?
To find out, just click on the banner above, or on October Tour!

Item Two: New Dry Bones Website
We finally snagged the DryBones.com URL!! ...So we're setting it up as a portal to everything Dry Bones. To check it out, just click on drybones.com

Shana Tova

Shana Tova! ...Happy Jewish New Year!!

Jewish New Year (1994)

Today's Golden Oldie is a Dry Bones cartoon done 15 years ago for Rosh HaShana 1994.

This year, the holiday will start at the sunset tomorrow, Friday, the 18th of September. Saturday, the 19th of September is the first day and the holiday will continue until sunset of Sunday, the 20th of September.

Physical Dexterity

When I was a schoolboy in the "old days" in America I, like the kid in panel one of today's cartoon, was forced to learn "penmanship". And what we dutifully practised was called the "Palmer Method".

"In America, the idea of a prescribed form of handwriting was championed by Austin Palmer over a century ago. While working for the Iowa Railroad Land Company in the 1880s, he observed that clerks doing ornamental penmanship "flourished all capitals with a free-arm swing, with the arm completely off the desk." They used an entirely different movement to write normally. "The most swift and tireless penmen appeared to keep the arm on the desk at all times and formed their letters with little or no motion of the fingers — a free and tireless style of penmanship." Palmer realized that his "muscular movement writing" was something that could be taught and that advertising his "system" could help him to change the world — that everyone's handwriting could be efficiently executed while basically looking the same. There need not be confusion in the world because of a messy scrawl! The Palmer Method of Business Writing sold one million copies in 1912. By 1927, the year that Palmer died, 27 million Americans had learned the Palmer Method." -more

* * * I got a fancy new phone today. It's like the one that the kid in the last panel is using ...and I haven't written a "proper" capital Q (see the chart above) in thirty years! I wonder what Miss Batzel (my first grade teacher at P.S. 67 in Brooklyn) would say.

High Holiday Message (1979)

Today's Golden Oldie is from September 19, 1979. A Dry Bones cartoon that I did thirty years ago!

The Rabbinic Authorities in Israel represent "official" Judaism, i.e. the strain that in America is called "Orthodox", and that is called (in Hebrew) "Religious". The partizan politicizing of the Rabbinate results in the kind of dumb public pronouncements that prompted this 1979 cartoon.

angels

I've used these two angel characters for years and years. They, like me, have been watching the search for "Peace" for years and years.

This reminds me of the old joke about the drunk who dropped his house keys on his doorstep, but then looked for them under a nearby street light "because there was more light there."

...we're watching yet another President searching for Middle East peace through concessions from the tiny Jewish State (as easy as looking under a street light) instead of where it might actually be found ...by getting the locals to accept the existence of the Jewish State (as difficult as searching in the dark).

Those Children of Israel

The phenomenon of Jews joining in on the demonization of Israel is astounding! From Israeli professors to Jewish reporters they are active in the defamation and delegitimizing of the Jewish State. Sometimes they are called "self-hating" Jews. I prefer to use "Jewish Defamers" (I don't think that for a moment that they "hate themselves").

On September 29th, The day after Yom Kippur, I'll be flying off to the States to do a cross-country speaking tour called "The Latest News and Other Jokes" which will feature a bird-watchers guide to these "Cuckoos in our Nest".

Stay tuned for further developments!

the Tricky Part (1999)

Today's Golden Oldie is from September 6, 1999.

A cartoon from ten years ago that is as fresh as the latest pressure on us coming out of the Obama White House.

Robot Teacher

Another cartoon fantasizing about how the future will see us.

Visitors (1979)

Today's Golden Oldie is from September 3, 1979.

This cartoon is going to take some explaining. Here in Israel, after you complete your army service, you continue to do reserve duty ("Milluim" in the Hebrew-polluted local version of English). When you are too old for Milluim ...they transfer you into the embarrassing "Old Guys Army" called "Haga". On Mr. Shuldig's right sleeve is a "Haga" armband. The three Hebrew letters, from right to left, are Hey, Gimmel, and Alef (HGA) pronounced Haga.

Back in 1979 Farrah Fawcett visited. This last week it was Madonna whose visit excited this beleaguered little democracy in the Middle East.

Netanyahu's Road Map

According to YNET:

Agreement reached between PM, defense and housing ministers to freeze building starts in settlements blocs and east Jerusalem until early 2010 enrages settler leaders. 'If Netanyahu implements Livni's policy – government's days are numbered,' Ariel mayor warns

"Settler leaders were furious Tuesday morning after learning of the agreement to freeze building starts in the territories, including in the settlement blocs and east Jerusalem" -more

Your thoughts?

Lockerbie, the Anger

As American anger grows at the release of the Lockerbie Bomber (for "compassionate" reasons) the real story is starting to break. According to the London Sunday Times:

Secret Letters Reveal Labour’s Libyan Deal

"DURING the past year a small ship bristling with computers and seismic equipment has been crisscrossing the Gulf of Sidra, in the Mediterranean off the Libyan coast. Its mission: to help to find BP’s next offshore oilfields.

The company’s search for oil off Libya and in a 20,000-mile area in the west of the country potentially offers as much as £15 billion in new revenue. But less than two years ago it was feared that the deal could founder — and the reason was wrangling over Abdelbaset Ali Mohmed al-Megrahi, the jailed Lockerbie bomber.

BP was finally given the go-ahead six weeks after a volte-face by the British government to include Megrahi in a prisoner transfer agreement with Libya under which prisoners could serve out sentences in their home countries. Jack Straw, the justice secretary, revealed this decision in a letter to his Scottish counterpart. He cited “wider negotiations” and the “overwhelming interests of the United Kingdom”.

Sources in the UK and Tripoli said last week that those wider interests included BP’s hoped-for share of Libya’s untapped oil and gas reserves. The decision to include Megrahi in the prisoner transfer arrangement was seen by Libyan officials as paving the way for his release — and BP’s much-coveted deal was finally ratified." -more

So tell me. Are you surprised?

Summer's End (1999)

Today's cartoon is from August 30, 1999

The August heat of 2009 has been brutal, but last night I convinced the LSW (Long Suffering Wife) that we should trudge up the hill to the latest addition to our neighborhood. A new outdoor cafe. One that is open 'til midnight. To our surprise the weather had changed. A cool night breeze was blowing.

We got to the cafe, ordered two cups of coffee (the LSW went with decaf), and perused the day's newspapers (traditionally provided to patrons at Israeli cafes) as we chatted. The cool of the evening bordered on chilly.

The cartoon that I did ten years ago ends with a cynical punchline, but last night was indeed one of those magical Israeli moments. Sitting at an outdoor cafe, sipping coffee, reading a newspaper, and chatting about the pleasant weather.

Gilad Shalit

Today's cartoon was done in anger and born out of frustration.

Israel's handling of the kidnapping and the "negotiations" has been, and continues to be a disaster. Here in Israel we are bombarded with constant "coverage" of the kidnapped soldier story. Constant debate about how many convicted terrorists we'll have to release. Israel's government seems unable to deal with the situation with any strength or intelligence. The truth is that there is simply no proof that Gilad is still alive. And no reason to believe that, after handing over the terrorists, we will receive anything other than a corpse ...as we have in the past.

Meanwhile the captivity of Jonathan Pollard continues, shockingly, to be ignored by our "leadership".

Prisoner Release (1999)

Today's Golden Oldie is from September 1999.

Back in 1999, Israel's government was planning to release convicted terrorists in a "deal". Back then they told us that they were working "quietly" for the release of Jonathan Pollard.

Ten years have gone by. Now, in 2009, another Israeli government is planning to release convicted terrorists in a "deal". And Jonathan Pollard is still in prison.